breaking news

attention! attention! my husband has posted on his blog!

so pick yourself up off the floor after falling over from shock, and go check it out.

winter wonderland

one look out the window this morning and i knew i had to drop everything and head outside with my camera. the kids and i loaded up and headed out to one of our favorite local spots in hopes of enjoying and capturing some of the beauty left behind after last night's snow. as levi's words expressed well: "mom, you don't have to take a picture of EVERY tree!" it was hard to stop taking pictures, but here's just a sampling.

i'm not supermom

yesterday was just one of those days. i was tired, distracted, unorganized, and unproductive. why does that always equal "failure" in my mind?

i just needed to get away last night to clear my head. as i was getting reading to leave, feeling terrible about myself for having to, matt gently said to me: "val, you're not a failure -- you're weak." his words penetrated my heart, in a good way, because i knew what he meant. instantly the Spirit within me resonated with what he was saying and something in my paradigm shifted.

along with the thought of being a failure come feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and drowning in despair. it leaves me feeling like i am in a pit from which i cannot escape, and distant from God. yet, the thought of being weak brings with it a sense of hope, because i know in my heart of hearts that that is a place where Jesus can be truly real to me if i meet him there. (not that Jesus can't also meet me in my failure -- it's just that the change in wording helped me see it differently.)

how easily we forget those famous words: "for the sake of Christ, then, i am content with weaknesses (etc)... for when i am weak, then i am strong." (2 Cor 12:10) how easily we project other notions of what it means to be great or successful. i don't have to look very far to feel like i am not accomplishing enough or measuring up in order to be considered a "good" mom, wife, Christian, or whatever. yet, when i think about what i truly desire in this life, it is not about being a good person (which i'm not) or having all of my theology crisply ironed (which i don't) -- it is simply about pointing to Jesus, to a power and a love so much greater than myself.

in that case, i guess matt's words to me last night should be a great encouragement -- being weak, being at the end of myself, is actually a good place to be.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." -Jesus (2 Cor 12:9)

winter

all this snow and cold is really starting to wear on my nerves. i keep asking myself (and matt), "so, why is it that we live here in the winter mecca of the midwest again??" in light of this, i was reminded this morning of something i read in a little book several months ago about the seasons, specifically winter, and how it can provide an analogy to the "winters" of life. i have thought of this often since. may it inspire you, as well.

"Winter here (in the Upper Midwest) is a demanding season -- and not everyone appreciates the discipline. (that would be me!) It is a season when death's victory can seem supreme: few creatures stir, plants do not visibly grow, and nature feels like our enemy. And yet the rigors of winter, like the diminishments of autumn, are accompanied by amazing gifts.

One gift is beauty, different from the beauty of autumn but somehow lovelier still: I am not sure that any sight or sound on earth is as exquisite as the hushed descent of a sky full of snow. Another gift is the reminder that times of dormancy and deep rest are essential to all living things. Despite all appearances, of course, nautre is not dead in winter -- it has gone underground to renew itself and prepare for spring. Winter is a time when we are admonished, and even inclined, to do the same for ourselves....."

-"Let Your Life Speak", Parker J. Palmer, pg. 101

i just love the inspiration here to see the unique beauty that winter provides, even amidst the harshness and lack of visible life. i love the thought that even though many of the trees and plants appear to be dead, they are still very much alive -- it's just that their life is underground and not visible during this season. i love the hope that this picture gives me for my own life.

this is just cool

matt told me about this youtube video. very creative use of a guitar.

sawyer's 1 year photos

blizzard fun

yesterday the weather was so bad here that the police issued a warning for folks to only go out in the case of an emergency... too bad matt heard this news just as miriam and i were pulling out of the driveway to go see charlotte's web. :) besides the few times on the drive there and back when i could see nothing but white, we had a great time. it was a sweet movie, and it made me want to live the quiet, quaint country life with lots of space and animals. fern, the main girl in the story, reminded me a lot of miriam in the way she so loved the animals. we stayed until the very end of the mile-long list of credits because i liked the music -- funny how it takes literally hundreds of people to create such a "simple" story... i also found it both humerous and a bit sad to learn as i watched the credits that the movie was actually mostly filmed in melbourne, australia -- again, interesting that they had to go that far to find a location that depicted the perfect "american" country setting... i THOUGHT one of those crows had a bit of an aussie drawl! i guess i shouldn't base my ideals on the movies.

we cancelled our date night plans for later that evening, deciding instead to invite some of our neighbors over for a spontaneous game night -- since we were all snowed in anyway! we had so much fun that i think we will need to do it more often.

today it's still snowing and blowing, but we hope to venture out later to watch the super bowl with friends. (GO BEARS!)